Today in sacrament meeting a wonderful talk was given on motherhood. The sister who spoke began by reading a letter that was written to the first presidency, in which the mother writing expressed her hidden concerns that she did not matter in the eyes of the Lord.
As I sat and listened, I could hear the many prayers and thoughts that I too have felt on many occasions. It particularly touched me now, I believe, because it has not been long since I have had those feelings. Most recently I remember expressing a bit of my concerns to Shon, that I just wish I could feel equal to him, not better, just equal.
It seems, and we have been told this over and over, that motherhood is often overlooked as the Divine calling that it is. When I am told that, the spirit definitely confirms in my heart that this is true. But how easily it is forgotten in the day to day routines of rushing kids off to school, helping with homework and cleaning up messes.
Today I was reminded that the single person that our Savior reached out to on the cross was his mother. As I continued to think about this today, I remembered that the first presidency message this month, written by Elder Uchdorf was on The Influence of Righteous Women. He wrote, quoting President Heber J. Grant "Without the devotion and absolute testimony of the living God in the hearts of our mothers, this church would die." He goes on to write, "Sisters, your example in seemingly small things will make a big difference in the lives of our young people."
I may not be making a difference as the world sees it. I may feel constantly overshadowed by my good husband, but there is only one person that four little very special people call mommy. And at least for now, that is what matters most.